Marriage and having kids are the two most preferred solutions for almost all problems by a certain segment of society. Little do they know that becoming a mother is a complete life transformation process. More so when you are a second-time mom. Yes, it flips your world completely. Both literally and figuratively. Everything in your life gets replaced by all things baby related.
Mugs of caffeine and glasses of wine find their place back on the shelves and soon the mugs of milk, juices and other healthy concoctions will replace them. Robin cook, Danielle Steel, and Sidney Sheldon get swapped with parenting books which are harder to fathom than guessing the culprit in Stephen King and John Grisham’s books. In the cupboard, go, the stilettoes and you have flats and cushioned walking shoes for company. The LBD gets interchanged with feeding-friendly dresses! Uff, as a second-time mom I can go on and on about how your life changes completely when you enter the gates of motherhood.
Want to raise happy kids? Read here how
Life does a little flip as a mother
Oh yes! I will not forget the dads, life changes for them too. How and why can be a topic of discussion for a new blog, some other day. This swapping doesn’t end when the baby comes, it just continues and trust me, it is rewarding in many ways than one but equally exhausting. So, to all the mohalle wali aunties, remember when you told newlyweds, to have babies and all will be ok, and how you told first-time mothers to have another child and it will be a perfect family? Well having kids and raising them is not an easy job! Kids don’t just grow up like that, and being a second-time mother is easy (not)
Ahh! Well, as a mother who is highly emotional and dotes on her kids, yes, I will agree that they grow up in the blink of an eye but it takes more than a village to raise them. While having a baby is highly glorified, no one ever warns us or prepares us for the struggles it brings. From setting up a sleep routine to breastfeeding, formula feeding, diaper changes, and physical, emotional and mental changes, there is always so much happening. That’s the story of being a first-time parent, and when you become a second-time mother, add the responsibility of an additional human on your already slouchy shoulders.
So there are things that you know already, like holding a baby or how to change diapers or breastfeed. However, each child is unique and has their patterns of sleeping, feeding and other things. It is as good as being on the roller coaster ride of motherhood for the first time. There is no guarantee that what worked for your first baby will work for your second one too. Yes, even though your secondborn looks and behaves exactly like your firstborn, even then they will differ.
Things you will wonder about as a parent
You’ll often wonder how you let yourself get lured into signing up for this. It is like a 24 x 7 battlefield where you are changing a poop diaper and solving a math problem at the same time. You’ll also have the pleasure of patting the head of your soon-to-be pre-teen son while you breastfeed your infant. Oh, and not to forget that carrying a baby in one arm and flipping pancakes with the other, is a skill acquired only by trained professionals. You’ll be less worried about trying new things with the secondborn. May be also will be more confident about stepping out, yet as a second-time mom, still wonder why you have that empty feeling knocking through your chest.
Then you will have days when you will look at two humans you created accidentally and your heart will melt into a puddle. Despite the gibberish banter from the little one who has learnt only to babble, you’ll see that she gets really upset when her elder brother is being yelled at! Ahh! So much love, love that can make you feel sick. Ok not literally but you’ll feel so on the days (read many days and weeks, and months) when you haven’t slept and still juggle chores on repeat. But then what is life without a little drama, as a parent, especially as a mother you will always have tons of it.
Stress not, there are perks of being a parent too, read here about them
So if you ask me, do I find it easy being a second-time mom? My answer is NO, because whether a first-time parent or a second-time or a third-time, it is never easy. Raising kids, parenthood, and everything associated with it is never easy. It takes a lot, emotionally, mentally, and physically especially when you go under the knife twice. But is it fulfilling, oh yes, indeed? Fulfilling enough for you to write a blog about it, for it to be the first thing you want to ask, think and talk about? Do you find it rewarding, well that only time will tell, for now, my kids are my biggest reward!
