Social media, mom life and overthinking
After putting my toddler to bed, as I scrolled social media, something strange but not uncommon happened. Too many thoughts were taking over my mom brain! How do I describe them? Have you ever handled a tap with a faucet gone bad, you’d know what I am talking about. You try desperately to stop the water from overflowing. From fidgeting with the tap with your hands to trying to catch hold of something to get it to stop. You search helplessly for a cloth, an instrument, or a bucket to just contain the water. You want the chaos to end somehow and not create further mess. The only difference here is that I don’t want these thoughts to stop overflowing! I want them to consume me in a way that the only option left for me is to change. But why the sudden need to change?
A little back story about my mom life
Let’s rewind a few minutes. I desperately opened my laptop to pour my thoughts because I was worried that I’d lose the trail of them. As I successfully managed to get my 13-month-old to bed, I decided to turn to the good old social media. While she was happily milk drunk and drifted off to deep slumber (keeping my fingers crossed). And I began scrolling my Instagram feed. Not sure if it counts as a heinous crime. I am still figuring out if it did more harm than good. Yes, I chose to spend my precious time on social media, instead of following the worldly advice of, “a mom should sleep when the baby sleeps’.
I went through the usual cooking videos, home rearrangement videos which are a must as a mum I guess. Spent a few more minutes straining my eyes over more ASMR videos, and eventually, something caught my attention. Social media is different kind of drug. Eventually I stumbled on an acquaintance’s profile, who seemed to have undergone great body transformation. Was I happy for her, well, maybe, I mean, I guess so? Did it get me thinking? Hell, yes! As I watched videos of her exercising and lifting weights. I thought to myself, boy I could do this too. I mean, I am pretty proud of myself for being able to practice Yoga all through my pregnancy. Even today when I attempt the asanas taught to me, I can practice most of them with ease. Oh! it’s another thing that I just practice once. Honestly there has been no real workout in the last year or so. Ok, do you consider mom running after her kids and a few love making sessions as exercise? It does bother me how I am unable to find time for something important for me. Fine, let me admit, bother is a small word. Instead it makes me swallow my own existence and I want to hide under a rock. In fact, I just bawled my eyes over, how time is on a magical carpet, just zooming by! Something, if done with consistency, will help me transform myself. But hey wait, didn’t my body just transform? I mean 9 months of pregnancy with a big baby and then being cut open seven layers deep! It does count as body transformation, doesn’t it?
Looking to bring about a lifestyle change, read this
See, being an optimist has its pros and cons. Before I decided to self-loathe myself with how I wasn’t paying enough attention to myself or how my life was reduced to just doing certain chores, I asked myself a few questions. Well, this so-called acquaintance may have done some remarkable work for herself, but hey she isn’t a mom yet! She is just a 25–26-year-old, who probably doesn’t even have to worry about meals or homework. She has no kids. Hence keeping kids neat and clean, arranging the house, and juggling work are not a priority for her. Apart from all this, she doesn’t have to ensure that is she is a good mom and not lose her shit. I know, I’ll have plenty of show of hands from people, especially on soial media, who do this and more. They are hustling to be a great version of themselves. I’m sure I’ll get there too. For now, I am busy working from home, for home and raising two kids. I am striving desperately to strike a balance between couple time, kids time, me time, career time and time itself. Hence being the best version of myself in terms of regular workout doesn’t top my list currently. While breastfeeding has helped me shed kilos, I still have my mommy pooch, thanks to two c-sections. I’m still caught up in the battle of an urge to catch up on my sleep which has been a luxury ever since I became a mom, and writing down my thoughts. Guess, who won?
Being a mom is not easy. Don’t let social media make you feel worse
Enough beating around the bush, and letting my thoughts get all frenzied and loose trail. All I want to say that I am not even a work in progress when it comes to certain things. However, I am a mom who just whipped up pancakes, French toast and patties for school and breakfast. I’m also that mum that who prepared a DIY science project last night. Would it help, if I said, I’m the mum who rocked, walked and nursed her baby to sleep for over 2 hours plus at 4 a.m. Icicng on the cake is that, her baby to wake up in an hour? Being a mother is not the end of the world. It is the world because you are the world to someone. It is more than a full-time job, a job that’s serious business where you can’t take leaves. Nope neither casual ones nor sick ones. A job where you can hire employees but you are the founder and the CEO. The one who runs the main show. So, the next time a social media post makes you doubt yourself, shut the darn phone, and write a 900 word blog that glorifies what you do. Because, you bloody deserve it, because you are one awesome human! Not just me, you also are a bloody good mom, and never let social media or anyone fool you.
